GOTH LOOKING FOR LOVE AND VAMPIRES IN COTTONWOOD, IDAHO!

by Greg Colfaz (NWM Staff Writer)

Being a 25 yr old Goth in Cottonwood, Idaho has been (to put it nicely) – an uphill battle. I work at Reiner’s grocery (on King Street – in case you ever drive through, on a dare). So it’s kinda hard to meet other folks who share my same interests. At night, the options don’t get any better. I’m usually locked into Keuterville’s pub (Pabst on tap and the Mariner’s on the flat screen). No future Girlfriend of the Night there. Truth be told, I’m not even a full-fledged Goth yet. I just shaved my head and got a silver skull earring – in my ear. Anything more, and the manager said I’d be unnerving to the older customers. So pretty much my only option (to celebrate my inner Goth) is the ol’ Thinkpad laptop, in my parents’ basement. Again, this scene is all new to me, but I was shocked by all the Goth club/dating sites out there. Plus Gothism has like a crazy amount of subcategories: Death Metal Goths, Geek Goths, Pagan Goths and Fetish Goths. The most popular (thanks to Twilight and True Blood) seems like the Vampire Goths. At first glance, I found a bunch of big singles sites. Some of the standouts to me (they had the most pictures) were Vampirerave, gothscene and vampirepersonals. All of ‘em are similar to Match, in the sense you need to fill out a profile and all that. Though I’ve found the Goth bios to be a smidge darker. At this point, I’ve made no love connection. Apparently, Cottonwood isn’t the haven for the fanged fatales. It’s fine for now, ‘cause if one answered I wouldn’t know what to do. Everything I’ve wiki-read says that V-Goths enjoy doing ritualistic stuff on their dates (like the real vamps). If bowling and dinner goes really well, they’ll most likely bite you (with custom made fangs). Then partake in a sip of the human red-sauce (wiki didn’t say how much). Some even like to sleep with their mates in coffins. To be honest I’m not sure if I’m ready for that yet, except maybe with the bi curious Pilates instructor – Bite4bitegirl22 (a looker indeed). If by some miracle (or the Goth Pagan God Tamuzz answers my prayer) and something does happen, I’ll be sure to update.

DRINK UP TRU BLOOD FANS!

Like many HBO-ians, I am glued to the TV every Sunday night at 9pm for another installment of True Blood (The Vampire/Supernatural series based on the books by Charlaine Harris). Wondering how Sookie, Bill, Lafayette and the rest of the residents of Bon Temps, Louisiana are going to escape all kinds of uber-bloody messes. Of course (because this is such an unconventional show), I’m always drawn to how a series like this will market itself. Aside from airing regular network promos, placing outdoor ads and a Comic-Con appearance what other venues are they using to gain viewers. That's my marketing / ad guy roots showing. Surprisingly, I actually thought True Blood dropped the ball. They have the golden egg of brand-marketing as the focal point of the show. And yet, they do nothing with it. That is until now. HBO is officially in the beverage biz. For 16 bucks (plus shipping) you can own a 4 pack of Tru Blood, the drink. The controversial recipe is varied a bit (they use blood orange), but the packaging and liquid color are pretty much the same. The taste of Tru Bood is being billed as a slightly tart and sweet carbonated drink. Unfortunately, it’s only available online, but I’m sure it won't be long ‘til you'll be able to scare one up at your neighborhood watering hole – on the rocks or warmed.