Laugh all you want lady bloggers, but nearly 5.2 million men deal with these 2 afflictions every day. I myself tested positive for Swamp Ass in college and my early twenties. And if you think it can’t happen to your man you’re dead wrong. Studies have shown that kept men are 9 times more susceptible to these diseases than single men. In fact, your significant other might have SA or MB at this very moment and you’d never know ‘til it’s too late.
WHY MEN?
There are two major reasons why the male species are prone to these diseases:
- Abnormal hair growth in and around the buttocks region.
- Laziness when it comes to wiping after #2.
KNOW THE SIGNS OF SWAMP ASS & MONKEY BUTT.
You should probably refrain from engaging in any sort of foreplay or heavy petting if you notice the following symptoms:
- Frequent itching or picking of the butt area.
- Squirming in seat.
- Ungodly smell.
ONLY KNOWN CURE.
At stage 4 of Swamp Ass or Monkey Butt toilet paper will NOT be of any help. Without getting too graphic, just know the TP will only stick to the problem…not wipe it away. The only surefire cure are baby wipes. These medicated, moist towelettes not only remove all excrement, but will also greatly reduce the smell by 60%. My top 2 Wipies picks are...
Purell Instant Sanitizer Wipes: Stings a bit more than the C-wipes. However these puppies are laced with a germ killing formula. Which is a plus when it comes to preventing the rash that plagues us after the excess poo is exorcised from our butt. Pack of 240 wipes goes for $34.98 on Amazon. 
