BINGE DRINKING BOARD GAME OF THE DAY

PASS-OUT – Players roll dice and land on spaces that correspond to different challenging tongue-twister cards. Recite it right, you get the card. Collect 10 cards and you win the game. $59.99 @ Amazon.

MY FAVORITE, FAVORITE DOG HUMPING TOY for under $20

I don’t know about you guys, but every time I see a dog make love to a couch leg it brings a smile to my face. I can only imagine the expression your child will have when they rush to their presents Christmas morning and unwrap a cuddly canine in the “let’s get it on” position. And with a little help from your favorite NY, Jewish, Christmas elf I can make that a reality for under 20 bucks.

SQUIRT THE HUMPING BULLDOG

Just attach Squirt to any leg, then squeeze his foot, and you’re off on a humping adventure. Costs only $15.99 @ 1ofakindstuff.com

ACCURATELY RECREATE THE FINAL SCENE OF THE SOPRANOS

Just out of morbid curiosity I caught a couple of civil reenactment videos on YouTube. The one thing the reenactments had in common (aside from lack of a boom mic), was they TRIED to be frightfully accurate. Now say you were going to recreate another important piece of history. For argument sake let's say the final scene in David Chase’s masterful opusThe Sopranos. You know the one where you were cursing your cable provider ‘cause the scene suddenly cut out. Anyway, here it gets a little easier thanks again to youtube (see below) and DVDs to figure out the general details. However, if you are aiming for that “frightfully accurate” realism here are some not so obvious facts to help…

The scene lasts 4 minutes and 32 seconds.

It takes place at Holsten’s in Bloomfield, NJ (it’s actually an ice-cream parlor so you’ll need to bring your own jukebox).

Once Tony selects his booth, he does a slight drum tap on the table (with both hands) before reaching his left hand to the jukebox to search songs.

Tony flips through 2 jukebox pages before landing on the Journey song.

Tony views the songs in following order before making his choice...

1. Sawyer Brown (Somewhere Into The Night)
   
2. Heart (Who Will You Run To)
   
3. Journey (Don’t Stop Believing)
   
4. Tony Bennett (I Gotta Be Me)

He chooses the song with his right hand.

Meadow attempts to parallel park the car twice before she succeeds.

Throughout the scene Tony nervously eyes the following people in this order...

1. young woman in black coat,
   
2. older man in baseball cap
   
3. young couple in love (slightly eyes over Carmela’s shoulder)
   
4. guy in windbreaker
   
5. waitress
   
6. guy in windbreaker (2^nd time)
   
7. waitress (2^nd time)
   
8. looks at door at ???
   

Journey’s Don’t Stop Believing stops exactly at 3 minutes and 38 seconds.

IN THIS DAY AND AGE HOW MUCH DOES A WHORE BAG GO FOR?

$29 @ Zazzle.

Hey, you asked. Oh wait, you didn’t. Well, anyhow, have a happy Sunday.

GREEK TRAGEDY AVERTED

My mom and I are currently involved in daily Words with Friends battles. At first I’d spank beat best her all the time. Then gradually mom started getting better and better. Now we’re neck and neck. However, I’m still at a disadvantage sometimes (just ‘cause she’s my mom.) The other day I could’ve spelled the dirty word below, but went for a lesser one. 

She wound up beating me that game by only a few points. What would you have done blogosphere?

INSTEAD OF THE ASS, GO FOR THE SEXY TOOTH TATTOO.

Next time you go to the dentist for a crown fitting think long and hard. Do you want the regular blah, ivory white, polished look? OR do you want the face of David Letterman? Thanks to the latest in tattoo teeth tech, you now have that option. New parlors like Toothartist offer a wide selection of hand-painted tooth art like Simon Cowell, Bob Dillon, Tiger Woods, plus all kinds of animals and symbols. Prices for tooth tattoos range from $75 to $500, depending on the artwork and the crown material. Most people go for the back teeth that aren’t viewable unless you choose. They also can be easily removed by your dentist with just a 5 minute grinding session.

MUTANT MATZO BALL MERVE & SAM by copyboy