70s TOYS OR TORTURE?

Technically some of these toys are from the early 80s. However, that doesn't make them any less torturous.

SIT ‘N SPIN – The object, twirl yourself around as fast you can. Sorta like your own personal Disney Teacup ride (except you had no operator limiting the speed). Made of sturdy plastic so it pretty much worked on any shag carpet. Doubled as a super safe, spinning sled in the blizzard of ’77.

BLIP – The ancestor to Pong. Wind it up and a red light shoots across the screen. To make the blip return to the other side, all you need to do is push the correct numbered button. Do it again and again, with no food pellet in sight. Made car trips a wee bit more fun than staring out the window at moving trees or bugs dying.

SIMON – 9 volt battery charged game of Simon Says, except with 4 colored lights and Close Encounters-type sounds. No bossy neighborhood kid needed. Not sure of the lasting effects of staring at blinking lights for hours on end.

KER-BANGERS – Remember that weapon David used to smite Goliath? Now imagine that as a toy, Ker-Bangers. Not sure how the manufacturers could guarantee “safe play” when you were swinging and smacking two Lucite balls inches from your nasal cavity. Though it is safe to say I lost my "nose bleed" virginity to this toy.