WOULD YOU BELIEVE I FOUND WALDO WHILE HAVING LUNCH IN GRAND CENTRAL?

Yep, the wife and I were dining in the Grand Central food court on a chilly Sunday afternoon. 

Just as I looked up from my yummy falafel platter (you should totally order it)... 

...something caught my eye and well…I’ll let the picture do the talking.

For those of you who need a bit of help I circled Waldo. Or is it Waldette? 

Either way it still counts! I win! Happy Halloween!

PERFECT FOR ANY HALLOWEEN PARTY – GOBS OF FAKE BLOOD

By now all those party Halloween evites are circulating. You’ve done the rough menu planning. Gave some thought to the scary movie and ambient music catalog. Maybe even started designing the overall horrific décor. So how are you in the fake blood category? Sure you could go store bought, but then you only get a teeny tiny tube of watered down red. Now, if you're aiming for something a bit more Carrie and biblical proportions-like – create your own. It’s easy and edible…

[Courtesy of Wiki How]

1- Stir up light corn syrup and red food dye (or cherry drink powder mix) until it starts to look like blood.

2- Next add cocoa powder to your bloody goop. This will darken up the color a bit to give it more of a real blood look.

3-If the blood is too thick add some water (slowly) to thin it out.

4-Douse the crap out of everything and enjoy!

HEMP-TASTIC HALLOWEEN CUPCAKES

Totally tasty and legal.

INGREDIENTS:

• 1 cup of Hemp flour
• 1 1/4 tsp. baking powder
• 1/2 tsp. salt
• 1 cup of sugar
• 4 tbsp. shortening
• 6 or 7 tbsp. Living Harvest Hempmilk (Tempt)
• 1/2 tsp. vanilla
• 2 egg yolks

DIRECTIONS (Makes 14 cupcakes):

In a cooking bowl, mix in shortening, sugar, hemp flour, salt, and baking powder. Add egg yolk, hempmilk and vanilla –blend well in mixer. Pour batter into lined muffin pan. Fill cups 1/2 full. Bake at 375 degrees for 20 minutes. Decorate with chocolate and orange frosting. Add sprinkles. Serve. Enjoy.

HELP! WHERE CAN I FIND A SLAUGHTERED DEAD COW PROP FOR LESS THAN $3000?

Please! Next time really try to challenge me. I barely broke a cyber-sweat searching. Just head on over to Hauntedprops.com. They got a slaughtered dead cow prop for ONLY $2,377.00.

Here’s what a bunch of Benjamins gets you  …

- A massive life-sized prop! 

- Foam filled latex with amazing detail that looks like the real thing up close. 

- Available in 3 different color schemes: Holstein (shown), Black, and South Western (call to specify).

- Very gross (their words, not mine).

THIS HALLOWEEN I PROMISE TO BE THE BEST BLOG STALKER

I'm actually away for the horrific holiday this year. Which means I'm without my laptop. So I can read all of your blogs, but it is very hard to comment. However I will do the next best thing. I PROMISE TO STALK THE CRAP OUT OF YOUR BLOG.
I won't just read your post...no sir. While your blog is sleeping, I will take skin scrapings and saliva from it.







I'll follow your blog where it meets other blogs for lunch. And when it goes to the bathroom I'll obtain a fresh urine sample (don't ask me how).




Then later when your blog is taking a spin class at the gym I will sneak in the locker room and steal the brush from your blog's gym bag.




That's how committed I am to stalking your blog today on Halloween. Btw...your blog's blood type is O negative. You're welcome.

GOOGLE AWKWARD SEARCH GAME: Halloween Edition

This week’s Google Awkward Search Game sponsor (without them knowing it) is HALLOWEEN24.COM – makers of the quality bloody heart.

Looking to scare those candy-grubbing kiddies? Add some fright to family game night? Have no fear, the bloody heart is here. It’s made of high-grade plastic and latex (same stuff they use on the actual space shuttle). And if you act now you can get this fake bloody heart for ONLY $8.48! That's $8.48! And if you use the code NOT WORTH MENTIONING you won’t get nothing extra (sorry).

Ok, back to the game. Just want to remind you of the rules: In the search area type in part of a statement or question. Then simply let Google finish it off. Here are some [insert corny Halloween adjective here] examples.

HELPFUL HALLOWEEN COSTUME IDEAS FOR PRIVILEGED WHITE KIDS

Trick or treat time is within spitting distance. At this point most kids, tweens, and teens are putting the finishing touches on their costumes. Sadly though, there are a few unfortunate privileged white kids who still have no clue what to go as for Halloween. Time is ticking. And if they don’t lock down a look soon they might fall out of good graces with their peers as well as certain social circles. I figured that’s good enough a reason to lend a helping hand. That and knowing I'd bring joy to some poor, privileged white kid. 

Costume Idea #1: JERSEY SHORE CAST –The big draws for white privileged kids are 1) they get to pretend to be an ethnicity that didn’t arrive on the Mayflower, 2) be even more prone to violence and/or substance abuse for the night. Suggested age: 14 and up [$23.99 @ Buy Costumes]

Costume Idea #2: NAUGHTY ANYTHING – An inexpensive option for female privileged white kids. Basically you can naughtify any professional uniform (i.e. nurse, policewoman, executive, etc.) simply by tightening and shortening. How far you’re willing to go is up to you – tempting tart or straight-up whore. Suggested age: 18 and up [$37.95 @ Discreet Novelty]

Costume Idea #3: PIMP & HO –No explanation needed. Suggested age: 18 and up [$169.96 ea. @ Pimp Costumes]

Costume Idea #4: A SEXT – Very topical, provocative, and perfect for any body conscience, white privileged individual. Suggested age: 18 and up [$39.99 @ ShinDigz]

BLOGS THAT USE WORD VERIFICATION ARE SLOWLY KILLING US (and I have the numbers to prove it)

Every now and then I like to do a PSA on this troublesome issue that still plagues the blogosphere. If I can convert just one of you WVers then I’ve done my job. Hopefully my numbers will do just that. But first…

4 MEH FACTS ABOUT WV:

1-The official tech term is CAPTCHA (pronounced/ˈkæptʃə/):


2-Stands for…Completely Automated Public Turing test to tell Computers and Humans Apart

3-It was created in the year 2000 by a team of scientists at Carnegie Mellon.

4-CAPTCHA's main usage is to protect sites from the onslaught of automated spam.

SO HOW IS WORD VERIFICATION A SILENT KILLER?

Here are my staggering stats …

Average time it takes it takes to use Word Verification = 5 sec.

Average # of blogs a blogging-person reads per day = 20

Total time spent Verifying per day = 1 min 40 sec.

- per week = 11 min. 6 sec.

-  per month = 44 min. 24 sec.

- per year = 9 hours 40 min. 8sec.

- per life (80 yrs.) = 32 days 2 hours 10 minutes 6 seconds

BOTTOM LINE: By using Word Verification you are stealing a little over 1 month from each of our lives. Time we could spend with our loved ones, exercising, creating stuff – essentially living life.

HERE'S HOW TO END WV:

AND HERE’S HOW TO SCARE THE CRAP OUT OF SOMEBODY THIS HALLOWEEN.

The Toilet Monster fits onto most T-seats and costs only $14.99 @ TheNoveltyHut.com

CREATE A BLOODY HALLOWEEN PRANK WITH A STICK OF GUM

This gag from Instructables is perfect for partygoers and anytime you want to see your friends crap themselves. It’s also pretty cheap to pull off (around 20 bucks). Here’s what you need.

- skin tone makeup ($5.99 @ Amazon)

- piece of soft bubble gum Bazooka (99¢ @ Walgreens)

- blue,red,black makeup ($9.99 @ Amazon)

- butter knife ($3.99 @ Amazon)

Here’s how it’s done.

Add the gum to the knuckle of your finger.

Touch up with skin toner.

Make a slight cut with a butter knife.

Add blue and black makeup.

Finish off with red makeup (or fake blood).

SEVERE ANGER MANAGEMENT THERAPY FOR ONLY $13.99

Stress balls are for p*ssies. Sorry, but it had to be said. Do you honestly think a foam little ball is going to help you get over …

• some jerk cutting you off on the expressway?
• a significant other dumping you for no apparent reason?
• a douche cutting 85 people (including you) in line at the bank?

F no! No amount of polyurethaned rubber can quell those feelings of hatred and homicidal-ness. Though holding a bloody, still beating heart in your hands might just do the trick. And now you can accomplish that goal for $13.99 @ Hollywoodtoysandcostumes.com. They offer an authentic latex reproduction of a bloody heart that actually beats with the help of 2 C batteries (see below). It’s the perfect stress reliever to get you to move on with your life. Much better than carving the real thing out of some lucky soul's chest cavity – which will net you 35 to life (22 with good behavior). Click here to order.

2009 HALLOWEEN COSTUME SUM-UP: ZOMBIE JACKO KING, BUT NAUGHTY GIRLS STILL HAD DECENT SHOWING.

BOBBING FOR APPLES: THE ADULT VERSION

Here’s a simple way to turn an age-old Halloween game (for kids) into a treat for all adults.

Step 1. Collect apples you will be using for game.

Step 2. On each apple, carve the initials of a partygoer (you may carve a person’s initials on multiple apples depending of the size of the party).

Step 3. Fill a large basin with water.

Step 4. Place apples in water.

Step 5. Partygoers must try to catch apples with their teeth.

Step 6. Depending on the apple they get the following can happen...

• if it has the initials of an opposite sex partygoer, the two must kiss for a predetermined length of time.
• If the initials are of the same sex partygoer, you can either choose that person or select anyone of the opposite sex.
• If the person chooses an apple with their own initials they too can select any partygoer.

NOTE: To avoid the "same sex" problem (if it is an issue), you can set up separate basins for boys and girls.

BARTENDER MATT’S SHOT FOR ANY SITUATION: THE HALLOWEEN PARTY STARTER

Perfect shot to give you an energized kick-start to a night filled with possible tricks or treats.

THE RED-EYE

Ingredients:

• Vodka
• Red Bull Energy Drink
• Ice

Directions:

• Add ingredients into cocktail shaker
• Shake well
• Pour in shot glasses
• Toast to the night.
• Repeat

LAST SECOND BAG OR BOX COSTUMES FOR SLACKERS.