Monday, May 30, 2011

NO LOVE SHOWN FOR A PATHETIC SOUL AT 12:22am


So it happened just how I predicted. The exact train time. The exact state of being. I’m the %$%# Nostradamus of the north shore of long island. 

If you read the post below you’d know I was at my friend’s BBQ yesterday. And sadly I can’t hold my liquor. So after 6 beers, 2 shots and one giant glass of suspect sangria I was on the 11:36pm train back to NYC. Wasted! 
And yes, as you can see from above I feel asleep. A kind, coked-up individual was nice enough to snap a pic with my iphone and return it to me (for 10 bucks and a stick of gum).

SO DID MY BLOGOSPHERE MATES AWAKEN ME IN MY TIME OF NEED?

Nope. Not one email pinged on my iphone at 12:22amEST. My request was denied. I'm not bitter, I know you guys had better things to do than rescue a fellow blogger in need. How's that for Jewish guilt? 

Truthfully, the only thing that jarred me up was my need to pee. Here’s a brief photo essay to show you how that went (yes, I peed in the brown water – I had no choice.)


BTW…try not to use all caps when commenting, I’m still hungover.

Stumble Upon Toolbar

26 comments:

  1. don't eat the yellow snow and don't pee in the brown water (it splashes on your pants and shoes)! at least you weren't driving!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I wonder why blogger won't let me leave any comments with my google ID?

    ReplyDelete
  3. No one on blogger will do anything like that! It's true, as you now know...I've been told that in order to generate more comments I should ask questions of my readers...so I ask questions and do you know how many answers I get? That's right. None. After a while a person feels really dumb asking questions of non-existent people...so I don't ask questions now, I just write as if no one is paying attention, because very few are. I'm not bitter, that's just how it is. If you were some famous celebrity writer, you would have had about 10million 'wake your ass up and get off the train' messages...people don't want to waste their time messaging or commenting to peons who are just like them. That's just how it is. Don't be bitter. Enjoy your hangover, if I were you I'd stay away from that brown water today! Peace.

    ReplyDelete
  4. oww, sry missed your post about this, i would've helped you out :(

    ReplyDelete
  5. make sure you are not in Bangkok.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I remembered at 12:03 last night. But I'm in central time so I was too late.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Since it would have been 3:22am where I live, I wouldn't have emailed Keanu Reeves.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I know what thats like, dude! But self-inflicted illnesses gets no sympathy.

    How could you bare your willy to that brown sludge??

    You look dead cute all passed out and everything. I would've taken SERIOUS advantage of you.

    ReplyDelete
  9. you shouldnt trust us bloggers

    ReplyDelete
  10. Sorry, Lamb, today was a work day. Got to bed early.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Awshit man. I was involved with a gaming console. Coughsorreh.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Well at least I told you the time zone snafu up front...and it happened! Where were you peeing at...an airplane bathroom! Glad the coke hound gave you your phone back. And I'll try harder next time.

    Sounds like Pat is experiencing what I was (while he was gone) with the comments issue.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Brown water?!?!? Your blog makes me gag more that I care to admit :) haha. Glad you had a fun Memorial Day weekend....even if no one called you. Sorry!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Poor thang. Sure hope you were able to remain upright, to pee. I tried to tell you to set your alarm on your phone. You didn't listen. Glad you made it home, safe and sound, albeit hungover.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Sorry, I was still officially on vacation...

    ReplyDelete
  16. Oh that pic is nasty. One thing that differs the north from the south is the south has really clean restrooms. Truck stops, travel rest stops are a pleasure compared to living in the Northeast.

    ReplyDelete
  17. I had to come back and add... I LOVE WHEN YOU BLOG "JESSE" POSTS! Sorry for shouting, but I needed to get that out there. I'm done, take some aspirin and go back to sleep.

    ReplyDelete
  18. WHAT
    I'm sorry, man, i didn't even get to read that post because I was out of town :( I would have emailed you had i seen it

    ReplyDelete
  19. That's one greasy night right there haha. I don't think I've ever seen a face that red! Sangria is dangerous?

    ReplyDelete
  20. i emailed you, but was confused by your post and messaged you a day earlier, my bad. my friend's husband would often fall asleep on the train and end up in deer park. that really sucked considering deer park isn't exactly the next town over from her.

    FourthGradeNothing.com

    ReplyDelete
  21. Oh, that brown water is disgusting!! Hope you aren't feeling too much pain today!

    ReplyDelete
  22. I feel like a dick now, I'm sorry for not waking you. If it makes you feel better I was roaming around New Jersey Cursing Ihop till about 2 am. Maybe next time

    ReplyDelete
  23. At 9:22 pm PST I was cleaning out my ancient refrigerator under my cranky mom, so I was in worse straits :/

    ReplyDelete
  24. DUDE, I'm telling you -- I sent you an e-mail last night...maybe a few minutes too late...but I really did!
    Why the heck didn't you get it?

    I swear, when I make a pledge to help out a fellow drunkard, I KEEP it.

    I suppose I must have been on beer number eight or nine by the time I e-mailed you, SOOOO.....

    Sorry!

    ReplyDelete
  25. Oh Jesse! I did read it but my tired ass was out by 11! I would've totally peed in the sink though. That brown water would've infected me just by looking at it! Be thankful you don't have to sit to pee!

    ReplyDelete
  26. sorry dude i totally fell asleep my bad


    Everyday Life

    ReplyDelete

 
Custom Search