YOU WIN CHRISTINE! I’LL STOP MASTURBATING IF YOU STOP LOOKING SO DARN CUTE.

Hi Chris O’Donnell.

Or is it Christine? I guess the other way sounds like the guy from one of those NCISCSI shows. He also played Robin (which he wasn’t half bad as).

Anyhow, just wanted to let you know that I am a Democrat. A blue stater if you will. I voted for Obama. I’m not a fan of NASCAR, but don’t judge people who are. So all that being said, I should be against everything you stand for. Though it's really hard for me to do so. Why? You are a good-looking lady (bordering on hot). You look sorta like a cross between Rachael Ray and the chick from the Seinfeld “We’re not gay, not that there is anything wrong with it” episode (Paula Marshall).

And to make matters worse you’re a woman with power. Nothing (in my warped mind) is hotter. But yes, I get it, those are not reasons for me to exercise my RIGHT TO PRIVACY for 3 minutes or so. HOWEVER, if you are going to be the poster person for ANTI-MASTURBATION then take responsibility for the problem. I mean, have you seen the hottie pictures YOU (or supporters) have posted online? Tell you what, I’ll stop being a male piggie. Stop my lust-filled waxing of the dolphin (masturbating) AND give this whole Tea Party thing a fair shake. All you have to do is take the following sexy images off the internet. Remove the temptation.

Sporting the naughty, pouting mischievous look.

Love the librarian / Sarah Palin glasses.

Green + tight = impure thoughts

Not even dignifying this with a caption.