Saturday, January 1, 2011

GET SKINNY THE HARD WAY OR THE EXOTIC WAY IN 2011


Starting tomorrow (ok, technically today), you could sweat it out in the gym for 2 plus hours, and maybe what? Lose like a pound or two? OR, you could swallow a tapeworm* (pictured above) plus a couple of his brothers, sisters, and cousins. Then sit back, relax and let 'em digest some of your food 'n calories…at least ‘til you crap ‘em out.
The choice is yours.


BTW...Minor drawbacks include…
  • Abdominal pain
  • Weakness
  • Headache
  • Nausea
  • Diarrhea
  • Constipation
  • Bloating
  • Something ALIVE in your stomach


J.D. POWER’s #1 RATED TAPEWORM
Dipylidium caninum*

* As fun as it sounds, this blog in no way endorses this barbaric method of losing weight. Plus, to be honest…I think the tapeworm I just mentioned is only found in dogs. Sorry. Oh, and Happy New Year!

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Posted by Copyboy at 12:35 AM
Labels: , , ,

38 comments:

  1. VaporJanuary 1, 2011 at 12:37 AM

    Tapeworms, the less barfy way to get skinny.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Jon HansonJanuary 1, 2011 at 12:39 AM

    It's worked for celebrities for years.. why the hell not?

    SD
    simpledudecomplexworld.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oilfield TrashJanuary 1, 2011 at 12:43 AM

    I am on the tequila diet. It helps a little bit.

    ReplyDelete
  4. AnonymousJanuary 1, 2011 at 12:51 AM

    Ewwwwww to both xP

    http://theadorkableditzmissteps.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  5. MarnieJanuary 1, 2011 at 1:35 AM

    The amazing thing is that there are people out there who would do this. Yikes!! No thank you. Every year I start a cleanse during the first week of January. Much easier :0)

    Happy 2011! xo

    ReplyDelete
  6. ericsJanuary 1, 2011 at 2:36 AM

    who goes to the gym anyway. this is a much better solution.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Henrietta CollinsJanuary 1, 2011 at 2:46 AM

    i think the choice is pretty fucking obvious.

    where do you get said tapeworm?

    ReplyDelete
  8. ZombieJanuary 1, 2011 at 3:13 AM

    or you could just have a zombie eat away all your fat.

    ReplyDelete
  9. AnonymousJanuary 1, 2011 at 10:22 AM

    I think this a great alternative then working out! Who wants to waste their time when you can get the same results with tape worms ;)

    ReplyDelete
  10. Mister SharafJanuary 1, 2011 at 10:51 AM

    gl with it :)

    happy new year

    ReplyDelete
  11. Sharon DayJanuary 1, 2011 at 10:51 AM

    That is like psychic weird! I knew you'd do a new year's diet one and I kept thinking, he should do the tapeworm diet--huge in the CA crowd out west and now spreading to Scottsdale/Phoenix. No surgical scars but same effect as having a stapling. You do know the worm has to come out at some point???

    ReplyDelete
  12. BBJanuary 1, 2011 at 11:05 AM

    I seriously need to lose weight but I'm quite sure I could get that down! Gross, haha.

    Thank you so much for making me New Blog of the Day! Can't tell you how much that means to me! Looking forward to getting to know you more. BB @ bouncinbarbs.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  13. Bargain HunterJanuary 1, 2011 at 11:28 AM

    Happy New Year =)

    ReplyDelete
  14. Alex J. CavanaughJanuary 1, 2011 at 11:54 AM

    Think I'll pass...

    ReplyDelete
  15. Marie NicoleJanuary 1, 2011 at 12:32 PM

    Sounds good enough for me! And if I take enough Capt Morgan, the worm will be clean too! Ha! Take that...

    MN
    noreallyitsnotme.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  16. AnonymousJanuary 1, 2011 at 12:42 PM

    This is dangerous. I'd consider exercising.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Babes MamiJanuary 1, 2011 at 12:53 PM

    I know that you're just being silly but I have read before about people ordering tapeworms to eat for the purpose of weight loss. Scary stuff!

    ReplyDelete
  18. that guyJanuary 1, 2011 at 1:41 PM

    wandered over from Bouncin' Barbs blog..nice choice for BOTD!

    i prefer to binge and purge...or just binge, really...

    this ridiculous attraction to being thin but still lazy is silly...

    Happy New Year!
    Bruce
    bruce johnson jadip
    evilbruce
    stupid stuff i see and hear
    Bruce’s guy book
    the guy book

    ReplyDelete
  19. AnonymousJanuary 1, 2011 at 1:57 PM

    And then when you are ready to take your new fit self to the spa and reward yourself with a pedicure, they'll put your feet in a tub with a bunch of little fish who will eat the dead skin off your rough heals. Sorry, did I make you just throw up in your mouth? I did when I read about this new trend awhile back. EWWWW! Then there is the coffee passed through the bowels of a wild civicat- G

    ReplyDelete
  20. bonemanJanuary 1, 2011 at 2:20 PM

    Guess I better stop kissing my dog, then, eh?

    nah...I don't kiss my dog.
    If I could, why would I even bother with girls?

    Still, talk about sales points.
    All Natural, Organic method of dieting.
    OK, Copyboy, I'm on it!

    d=^))

    ReplyDelete
  21. Gucci MamaJanuary 1, 2011 at 2:55 PM

    If it wouldn't kill me I'd probably be game. Just saying.

    ReplyDelete
  22. The EmpressJanuary 1, 2011 at 3:00 PM

    Well, that is nasty gross if I do say so myself! Found you through Bouncin' Barb's blog and I'm so glad I did. How in the world did I not know about your blog until today? I'll definitely be coming back for more.

    Happy New Year!

    http://rantersbox.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  23. Bossy BettyJanuary 1, 2011 at 3:41 PM

    I love having choices like this.

    Hope your New Year is a wonderful one!

    ReplyDelete
  24. middle childJanuary 1, 2011 at 5:11 PM

    Wow. You know much about the world of weight loss. I want to know if it possible to have Anorexia for just as long as it takes to get down to the weight you are longing for. Can the Anorexia then be stopped before any damage is done? Thanks in advance Doc.

    ReplyDelete
  25. RebeccaJanuary 1, 2011 at 5:31 PM

    just found your blog and i find it very interesting will be back for more

    ReplyDelete
  26. baygirl32January 1, 2011 at 6:51 PM

    have you ever seen a real one of those? they are NASTY. think i'll pass

    ReplyDelete
  27. Hive45January 1, 2011 at 7:52 PM

    All the best for the new year!

    ReplyDelete
  28. CBJanuary 1, 2011 at 8:42 PM

    That sounds fucking fantastic and all... but I think I'll pass! Bring on the water pills! ;)
    Happy New Year Creeper!

    ReplyDelete
  29. Major MackJanuary 1, 2011 at 8:43 PM

    Thankfully, Im already ripped

    ReplyDelete
  30. UnknownJanuary 1, 2011 at 8:58 PM

    As much as I would like to lose at least 20 more lbs, I think I will stick to what has worked over months of effort instead of ingesting parasites. Though, for a second...na still disgusting!

    ReplyDelete
  31. Chris PhillipsJanuary 1, 2011 at 11:07 PM

    It's all fun and games until you poop one out. It's like aliens but in your rectum.

    ReplyDelete
  32. noogJanuary 2, 2011 at 12:28 AM

    i wish tapeworms were like the ones in that futurama episode... they just help you out and give you superpowers... not to mention deep tissue massages

    ReplyDelete
  33. Pat TillettJanuary 2, 2011 at 12:39 AM

    How about eating tapeworms AND going to the gym?
    This is hilarious Jesse!

    Happy New Year to you my friend!

    ReplyDelete
  34. Pandorah's BoxJanuary 2, 2011 at 1:52 AM

    BAHAHAHAHA!!!! Oh man. You are hilarious.....know where I can find one of those bad boys?

    ReplyDelete
  35. A Daft Scots LassJanuary 3, 2011 at 2:26 AM

    I'm fat and proud of it. If someone asks me how my diet is going, I say, "fine, how was your lobotomy?"

    ReplyDelete
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