Monday, January 3, 2011

CRAP! I FORGOT TO DO MY POST ABOUT THE TOP 3 JARS I FINGERED IN 2010.


Dang! Between my dissertation on “Tranq’ing Santa” and proving that Hello Kitty is a lush it must’ve completely slipped my mind. Really sorry about that. Especially since I know how high this post is on everyone’s priority lists (just under viewing this youtube video of a slug being salted to death.)


SO WHY DO I FINGER JARS?
1) I am a man. 2) I’m too lazy to get a spoon. And 3) fingering food helps me sober up after I’ve had too much liquor at social functions.

Enough stalling, HERE ARE THE 3 JARS I LOVED TO FINGER IN 2010.


 #3 – HELLMANN’S® MAYONAISE WITH EXTRA VIRGIN OLIVE OIL: 
Someone put something healthy in my absolute favorite condiment. Now egg and fat comes complete with cholesterol fighting oil.
NWM Tip: After 5 or 10 fingers, I always like to add Wheat Thins® to the mix. They taste oh so crunchy 'n creamy with a nice mayo coating.


#2 – ROBERT ROTHSCHILD BUFFALO BLUE CHEESE DIP: 
Discovered this jewel at my X-mas Eve poker game. The added bonus here is I can finger this jar hot or cold. Either way it has a distinct cheesy taste with a kick of hotness.
NWM Tip: Finger responsibly. Only nuke the dip for like 14 seconds or you’ll singe your digit.


And the #1 JAR I LOVED TO FINGER IN 2010 (and 2009 for those keeping score at home) IS…
MILKY WAY SPREAD: I simply can get enough of this creamy chocolate spread swirled with ribbons of vanilla icing.
NWM Tip: Perfecto with an ice-cold glass of milk and a Mallomar® or 12. 

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Posted by Copyboy at 12:02 AM
Labels: , , , ,

35 comments:

  1. Chris PhillipsJanuary 3, 2011 at 12:06 AM

    1) I have never seen a slug not react instantly to salting like that, normally they curl up completely with a few grains.

    2) go get some nutella.

    ReplyDelete
  2. VaporJanuary 3, 2011 at 12:12 AM

    The Milky Way spread looks delicious.

    ReplyDelete
  3. ericsJanuary 3, 2011 at 12:18 AM

    that's just fucked up, it's painful to see such a helpless creature suffer like that.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Gucci MamaJanuary 3, 2011 at 12:21 AM

    I am HORRIFIED at the mayonnaise.

    ReplyDelete
  5. UnknownJanuary 3, 2011 at 1:01 AM

    Didn't watch the slug. Is that seriously 83 seconds someone has wasted filming the unnatural demise of an invertebrate?

    Where's the peanut butter? Surely that beats mayonnaise....?

    ReplyDelete
  6. The Game Store GuyJanuary 3, 2011 at 1:51 AM

    Milky Way Chocolate Flavored Spread? O_o

    ReplyDelete
  7. Classically Trained NubJanuary 3, 2011 at 2:01 AM

    Milky Way...spread? Where did you find that??

    ReplyDelete
  8. A Daft Scots LassJanuary 3, 2011 at 2:21 AM

    Gimme a spoon and I'll eat that ENTIRE jar of Milky Way....thats fucking yummy.

    ReplyDelete
  9. TS HendrikJanuary 3, 2011 at 2:43 AM

    I didn't even know there was such a thing as milky way spread. All the things one learns reading your blog.

    ReplyDelete
  10. The EmpressJanuary 3, 2011 at 3:17 AM

    The Milkyway stuff looks delicious. Perhaps it is time to say buh-bye to the Nutella. Happy fingering!

    http://rantersbox.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  11. Shelby FoxJanuary 3, 2011 at 3:47 AM

    Awww man I love that olive oil mayonnaise! I don't think I will ever go back.

    ReplyDelete
  12. RebeccaJanuary 3, 2011 at 6:39 AM

    ew eating mayo straight from jar yuck i don't even eat it on sandwhiches gross but the milky way i'm so for that

    ReplyDelete
  13. Justsayin'January 3, 2011 at 7:54 AM

    I have never seen Milkyway chocolate spread! And that video reminds me of Black Flags Salt on a Slug.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Alex J. CavanaughJanuary 3, 2011 at 8:36 AM

    Never knew there was a Milky Way Spread!

    ReplyDelete
  15. باز راس الوهابية وفتواه في جواز الصمعولة اليهود. اار الازعيم-O FLUVIÁRIO NO DESERTOJanuary 3, 2011 at 9:17 AM

    the road to be a two hundred pound or 300 pound man is harsh.....

    ReplyDelete
  16. baygirl32January 3, 2011 at 9:18 AM

    milky way spread...is that nutella and fluff?

    ReplyDelete
  17. AnonymousJanuary 3, 2011 at 9:23 AM

    I have never seen this milky way spread...I am intrigued.

    ReplyDelete
  18. BBJanuary 3, 2011 at 10:36 AM

    Wow Copyboy...now those are some jars made for fingering. I have never heard of the Milky Way spread. At least down here in South Carolina or in Connecticut where I'm from. Fun post. Thanks.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Megan HarmeyerJanuary 3, 2011 at 10:37 AM

    OMG The bleu cheese dip section cracked me the hell up! Milky Way spread? O M G I have to find some of that!!!

    ReplyDelete
  20. Mister SharafJanuary 3, 2011 at 10:46 AM

    nice post

    ReplyDelete
  21. MarnieJanuary 3, 2011 at 10:47 AM

    I'm with the poster that mentioned Nutella. Get some. Trust me.

    ReplyDelete
  22. MarleneJanuary 3, 2011 at 11:38 AM

    Singe your digit?! I love it!

    ReplyDelete
  23. Henrietta CollinsJanuary 3, 2011 at 11:53 AM

    so, i had to skip the slug salting video. i left beastiality behind in my college days. i swear.

    and don't you think your GIRLFRIEND should have have been amongst the fingered jars of note?

    a little CONSIDERATION, MAN!

    ReplyDelete
  24. Sharon DayJanuary 3, 2011 at 1:03 PM

    Oh God! You got my total rapt attention with the buffalo bleu cheese. I will eat anything with buffalo sauce. ANYTHING. Yummers! I think I'd be tonguing that one instead of finger it, though.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Pat TillettJanuary 3, 2011 at 1:36 PM

    Milky Way spread? Never heard of it, going to the store today to buy some...
    Thanks!
    I'll probably use a spoon.

    ReplyDelete
  26. mrecanJanuary 3, 2011 at 2:03 PM

    i dont like mayo but that milkyway jar blew my mind
    first thing tomorrow is to get one of those

    ReplyDelete
  27. AllyJanuary 3, 2011 at 3:02 PM

    #2 looks like it was part of a holiday gift basket. Ha ha! My hubs loves that mayo, I'm not a fan. I say if it's not the full on real deal mayo, then I won't have any :( That milkyway stuff looks yumz though!

    ReplyDelete
  28. tomi991January 3, 2011 at 5:34 PM

    hahaha, nice post man :)

    ReplyDelete
  29. DaisygirlJanuary 3, 2011 at 6:04 PM

    well this post made me a little sad being it was about finger jars....haha you are whack!
    Hilarious though just about peed my pants!

    Now where do you get that milky way stuff?

    ReplyDelete
  30. Monster MadnessJanuary 3, 2011 at 6:09 PM

    This post was a little weird, but cool! haha.

    ReplyDelete
  31. ChuckJanuary 3, 2011 at 7:22 PM

    I have never heard of the Milky Way Spread...you know it's not April 1st right?? Don't toy with our taste buds.

    ReplyDelete
  32. BatgirlJanuary 3, 2011 at 8:34 PM

    ohmy...milky way stuff looks amazing. especially because i just got my wisdom teeth out and i'm having trouble with solid foods :c

    ReplyDelete
  33. CBJanuary 3, 2011 at 10:13 PM

    Hmm... Well now do believe that my heart is broken! No mention of peanut butter anywhere. Hmph!

    ReplyDelete
  34. Major MackJanuary 3, 2011 at 10:52 PM

    mayo is the only one ive even seen :)

    ReplyDelete
  35. anon408January 3, 2011 at 11:31 PM

    That Milky Way looks deliciously unhealthy. Also, JarSquatter? (Don't look it up)

    http://anon408.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete

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