Unfortunately as a lifelong NYer I have never truly lost my true State Fair cherry. True, I have been to Disney World and a petting zoo. So maybe if you combine the 2 experiences I can somewhat get an idea of what a State Fair is all about. However I am sadly lacking in one category – the contests where you have a shot at making some green (between $100 - $500), and winning a blue ribbon. Here are 10 events that I must add to my bucket list.
Honey & Bee Culture: Exhibitors compete in who has the best tasting honey, beeswax crafting, and hive-care.
Crop Contest: Farmers showcase veggies that are judged in taste, looks, and size.
Livestock Contests: Judges are on the lookout for prize-winning beef cattle, dairy cattle, swine, sheep, Boer goats, dairy goats, llamas, chickens, ducks, geese, turkeys, pigeons, rabbits, and stock dogs.
Bird Calling Contests: Participants get 3 minutes to give their best duck, turkey, or chicken call.
Monster Arm Wrestling: Name says it all.
Mullet / Beard Growing Contests: Don’t believe me? Check the Iowa State Fair contest list.
Decorative Diaper: Judged on creativity, originality, and lack of smell.
Nail Driving Contest (guys and gals): Participants are judged on how fast they can drive 6 nails into a plank of wood.
Cow Chip Throwing Contest: Sorta like the discus throw except with bovine crap.
Rubber Chicken Toss: For ages 16 and up. Chickens are supplied.
Ahhh...home...I miss my Iowa State Fair!
ReplyDeleteI prefer tossing live chickens.
ReplyDeleteWow! Even though I live in Ohio, I have yet to go to the State Fair....and by your post, I am ok with that. And why would someone want to throw cow shit?? I wanna meet the guy that came up with that contest!
ReplyDeleteI love honey. I would so want to be a judge.
ReplyDeleteWhat the fuck?I'm, eating and you're talking about cow shit Creeper!
ReplyDeletePeople really toss cow dung? Please say it isn't so. Wait....an idea!!!! If witchy poo comes back with her shittin' factory, I'm so tossing her petrified mongrel's crap at her. I'm gonna tell her you gave me the idea! :)
ReplyDeleteMakes me want to go right now
ReplyDeleteI have had many a wild time at state fairs. Like this one time behind the big yellow tent....
ReplyDeletehaha I don't know why but when I got to the "chickens are supplied" part, I lost it and started laughing out loud!!!!
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