60 MINUTES, THE DRINKING GAME.

Sure you could drink to brain-draining sitcoms like SAVED BY THE BELL or GROWING PAINS, but what would you learn? Next time you’re looking for some post-Sunday afternoon football, Mensa-merriment, you might want to try 60 MINUTES, THE DRINKING GAME.

RULES (similar to other TV-themed drinking games):

One long drink for the “stopwatch” opening and for each segment intro.

Drink 1 time for each reporter introduction in the beginning.

Drink 1 every time Andy Rooney says, “a friend gave me this…” 

Drink 2 every time Lesley Stahl’s questioning sounds accusatory.

Drink 1 for every “Harvard-sounding” word Morley Safer uses.

Drink 4 every time Scott Pelley says, “on assignment.”

Drink 1 every time a 60 minutes reporter uses the word “we” to refer to the American consumers.

Keep drinking until Bob Simon lifts his hands up from his knees in the “intro-monologue” part of the news segment.