USE THE WONDERS OF TECHNOLOGY TO LIE, CHEAT, AND NEVER FORGET A BIRTHDAY

My memory ain’t what it used to be. Nice side effect of aging. I’m sure soon enough I’ll need to... 

- find a large index card

- write the important date nice and big (in permanent marker)

- then duct tape it to my face – just so I’ll remember it the next day.  

I think the worst part is forgeting a crap-load of birthdays. I’ll probably forget yours too. And that sucks! Mostly 'cause that’s something you can’t take back. Oh sure, the person says they don’t care, but deep down they do. WELL NO MORE!!! WHILE I WAS SOAPY AND NAKED IN THE SHOWER YESTERDAY I THOUGHT OF AN INGENIOUS – NAY, A REVOLUTIONARY WAY TO NEVER EVER GET NAILED FOR FORGETTING A BIRTHDAY.

Step 1. Forget a birthday (easy enough)

Unfortunately it has to be someone you’re not that close with. Someone you talk to mostly through email.

Step 2. Send a birthday eCard to a slightly different address

An example would be if your friend’s email is john.smith@Ovac.com, send it to john.smith@Ovic.com

Step 3. Wait for the email to get bounced back to you

It should look like this...

Step 4. Forward the Birthday eCard to the correct email

Apologize to your friend for screwing up the address, but NOT for forgetting his or her birthday….because in their mind ta da da daaa…YOU DIDN’T!!!

ALMOST FORGOT!!! Change the date on the original “wrong” email so it looks like you sent it on your friend's birthday.

Step 5. Celebrate a job well done 

My personal faves are a pack of Pretzel M&Ms (only 150 calories) with Tab.