MY HOT NEW FAD DIET: FINGERING JARS

Hey, my diet pretty much does the same 3 things all those other flashy fad diets provide…

1. A viable way to get nutrients
2. Offers low calorie meal options
3. Helps with portion control

The hook of my diet is you’re limiting your carb intake. Which is pretty much the easiest way to lose weight – just like Atkins. The difference is you don’t have to ingest massive quantities of cholesterol-saturated red meats. Plus you hardly need to cook anything. As far as I cal tell, the only drawback of my JAR FINGERING diet is its NOT approved by any doctor yet (a minor setback that I intend to correct).

So here it is, the sample day menu. Enjoy.

BREAKFAST:

Generously finger Philly Whipped Cream Cheese container 4 to 5 times.

Enjoy a 1/2 a glass of orange juice.

Nutrition Info:

Fat: 8 grams

Calories: 225

Nutrients: Protein, vitamin A, C and Calcium

LUNCH:

Generously finger both Hellmann’s Reduced Fat Mayonnaise and Gulden’s Spicy Mustard 6 to 8 times. Wash everything down with a refreshing can of Diet Coke/Pepsi or sparkling soda.

Nutritional info (based on both jars):

Calories: 160

Fat: 8 grams

DINNER:

Have something sensible.

DESSERT:

Generously finger Cool Whip Free (and top with a squirt of Hershey’s chocolate syrup) 6 times.

Fat: 0 grams

Calories: 310

Beverage: Coffee (Sanka)

Nutrients: Fiber