NOW I KNOW FOR A FACT…HOMELESS PEOPLE HAVE SEX!

by Joshen McEwen (NWM Staff Writer)

This is a description of a first hand encounter. This does not follow my normal news reporting style of article writing. VIEWER DISCRETION IS ADVISED. I was walking home at approximately 11.15pm last night and passed a small playground. The type that is usually attached to a school or church and is no bigger than an average parking lot for a retail store. From the park, I could hear the grunts and squeals of what sounded like a woman being assaulted, I carefully approached the shadowy figures on the floor hoping that my presence would be enough to scare the creep off. Hoping I wouldn’t get assaulted myself (Never take this course of action, don’t be a hero.) Suddenly a smell like no other wafted into my nostrils, it was the most pungent, disgusting thing I ever dared smell. On the ground were two very dirty very tattered looking individuals telling me to get out of here. They seemed to be involved in what I can only describe as “happy wrestling”, at least that would be my G-rated term. Now I am not sure they were homeless, but they displayed all the tell tale signs. Amazed and disgusted I left and they continued. I never really took the time to grasp the concept that homeless people engage in sexual intercourse. Who would have known?