TEXTING ADVICE FOR TIGER.

by Biz-Boy (NWM Staff Writer)

From the guy who brought you “porn surfing” tips for married guys – here’s a texting tip that’ll keep you out of the doghouse…even if your significant other sees the message on your phone.

First off, (IF IT’S TRUE) I don’t condone what Tiger did. If you’re married you need to stick to the rules of the contract – plain and simple. That being said I am a guy. And unfortunately I can’t help to think about that type of situation, and (IF TIGER DID IT) how he could have avoided being in hot water, or the sting of a 9 iron. I think I have an easy 1-step solution.

USE A WEBSITE NAME INSTEAD OF THE SECRET "BOOTY CALL" GIRL’S NAME.

HUH?

Meaning, create a name that makes it SEEM like it came from a…

PORN & PRANK TEXT SERVICE SITE.

DOUBLE HUH?

Here are a couple of name examples:

Sexgurl-text-a-friend.org

Send-a-sexy-message.com

Just use those in place of the woman’s name. So this is how the scenario SHOULD go if your significant other discovers the cphone text:

Text Message from Sexgurl-text-a-friend.org:

“Hey I miss you. Keep thinking of last night. Call me.”

From there it’s pretty easy to play it off as a prank your friends at the office (or the golf course) played on you. Of course, that idea probably has a shelf life of 5 “accidental” discoveries from one number. Not sure how it’ll work out if you have an 8 to 10 stroke lead.