PORN SURFERS LOVE TO SCREW GOOGLE ANALYTICS

Being the blog-star I am (NOT!!) I get this question a lot from female bloggers –

“I DON’T GET IT, WHY DO I GET A TON OF VIEWS, BUT NOBODY SPENDS TIME ON MY SITE?”

The simple one word answer is PORN!

Now here’s a bit more of a detailed answer. i-Dollars to e-donuts you probably get most of those two second blog glances late at night. WHY? Because men (myself included) are porn surfing pigs. I compare it to Magellan the explorer. Sure he knew he was going to sail around the world. But truthfully, Magellan wasn’t sure what to expect. Same when it comes to guys masturbating. The goal is to get our rocks off, but we’re not sure how that’s going to happen. We just type in a few words in google, and off we go on our sinful odyssey.

“BUT MY ARTICLES ARE INNOCENT!!”

Is usually what a woman blogger might say next. And to that I say – NOT REALLY. I use my blogger bud Ally (Fourth Grade Nothing) as an example. She wrote an article on a boy band that gets a ton of hits and views. Now while I’m sure most are from her loyal fans, some are also from porn seekers. Here’s what I bet they (horny guys) wrote in the Google search page that brought them to Ally’s article…

Boy band busty groupies

Boy band Britney pics

Boy band concert pics of busty girls

Boy band backstage hot girlfriends

Of course when they get to Ally’s blog they realize there’s no porn on it, and quickly journey onward. BASICALLY ANYTHING YOU WRITE, A GUY HAS USED THOSE SAME WORDS TO SEARCH FOR PORN.

On behalf of the males, I do apologize. But just so you know, we ain’t changin’ our stripes...ever. If there is free porn on the web we will seek it out, no matter which blogs get in our way. Harsh fact of blogging life I know.

God Bless.